A Griz and a Bobcat walk into a bar...

Poke the Bear

A Griz and a Bobcat walk into a bar… 

by the editors

The Cat-Griz rivalry is a nasty one, and we’re here to throw some salt on the wound. At this year’s annual gridiron get-together, keep one or two of these up your sleeve.

  • Why do Griz grads put their diplomas on the dashboards of their cars?
    To qualify for handicapped parking.
  • What do you call a Grizzly with a Big Sky Conference championship ring?
    A thief.
  • What’s the difference between the Griz and a dollar bill?
    You can still get four quarters out of a dollar.
  • What does the average UM player get on his SATs?
  • How do you get a UM grad off your porch?
    Pay him for the pizza.
  • What are the longest three years of a UM football player’s life?
    Freshman year.
  • How many UM freshmen does it take to change a light bulb?
    Not sure—that’s a sophomore course at UM.
  • Do you know why the Griz were considering changing their team name to “the Possums”?
    Because they play dead at home and get killed on the road.
  • What’s the difference between a Griz fan and a carp?
    One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker—the other is a fish.